Pies and Pretty Things

Does anyone know where me's can find a Grievance Committee to hear my complaint? My Moomie---who me's don't like very much at this moment---has been calling me 'pie face' for a long time. Me's thought it was a nice nickname until today when she brought this pie home from the bakery---it's the first one me's ever seen. You tell me, how could ANY human think me looks like a pie! Do you see any resemblance?





Not only that, me just learned that Levi is famous and me's picture is hanging in an art gallery. Do you think they would do that if me was as homely as that brown pie thingie above? No, they wouldn't. Me's is cute and that pie looks like mud!




And my friend, Mona, just sent me this award. Isn't it pretty? Moomie made me promise not to eat that butterfly. Well, that's no fun---me's a boy, you know. So Levi is going to pass the award on to Lacie. She won't try to eat it. But the point is no one would sent me an award like this if I looked like a dish of mud!



Someone needs to make my moomie quit maligning me with that 'pie' talk. Levi just learned that word especially so I can file a complaint. 'Maligning' means "to say something misleading, false; to misrepresent someone giving them a bad name." That's exactly why Moomie has to stop calling me pie face! She will ruin my reputation as a pretty boy. She does smother me with kisses when she calls me that so maybe she's just getting that old people's thing---senility---and she forgot how ugly pies look? Oh, me's getting confused. What should Levi do? Help!

.

Did You Get My Pee Mail?

Anyone there? Levi here. Me is having a strange week. It started out good. On Monday Moomie and me left Daady sleeping in his La-Z-Boy and we went to the place that gives money to Moomie and bones to me. Then we went to Starbucks where me's got a cup of cream and Moomie got a caramel macchiato. Levi even got to check for pee mail and leave a few at the river park on the way home.

Tuesday Moomie was glued to the TV and the computer. She was watching something called 'hearings' and she told Daady if they don't turn out good for GM we'll have to live in the car. Levi doesn't see how we can do that! Me's don't understand why Moomie can't just go back to the bank and get more money if GM stops giving it to us. Life is really hard to understand. Last night Moomie woke up in the night a lot, walking the floors and disturbing my sleep. She is spooky when she gets like that.

Today Moomie and Daady had to go someplace to get a thingie fixed on the Blazer---a lift for Daady's rolling chair. While they were gone they put me in charge of guarding the entire house. Usually they only assign me the kitchen and laundry room to watch. So Levi was proud of my expanded duties.

When they got home, Moomie took me for a walk in my new jacket. When we got back to the house, Moomie said that jacket must have been made for a girl and was a waste of money. Me's had peed inside it. Levi wanted to tell her that me's did that on purpose so no one could follow me around. You can't be too careful when you've just been promoted to head of security. But she wasn't listening. She went right back to ignoring me and glued herself to the TV again.

Love, Levi

.

Levi, Naughty or Nice?

I've been remiss in checking up on my baby brother from up here at the Bridge, and it shows in his behavior. Lord, I don't think he'll ever grow up. He's nearly ten months old and look what he did to the carpeting---he pulled a thread and made it run. Our parent's new house is taking a beating, thanks to Levi. He's even put teeth marks on the rungs of a chair. It's one of those two-seater benches and not one of Mom's favorites so the carpet caper trumped his wood craving attempts on the naughtiness scale. It took Mom two minutes to forgive Levi for the chair damage and two days for her to quit mourning the damage to the carpeting.

On the niceness scale, Levi loves to sun himself in front of the glass door off the living room. He thinks he's a cat or something. He pulls his bed from the kitchen through the dinning room, plops it down in his favorite sunny spot, and crawls inside to enjoy his chew stick. This would be okay if he had 'normal' parents. But hauling his bed around turns our Dad's wheelchair path into an obstacle course. Dad doesn't seem to mind, though. He just laughs and uses one of his few words---shit---and Mom comes running to clear him a toy-free path. And when Dad moves around half the time Levi is right there edging backwards in front of the chair as he tries to pull the sock of Dad's paralyzed foot. Most of the time Dad laughs at that, too, unless he's in a hurry to pee. That's when Mom hears, "Oh, shit!" with some urgency that causes her to run faster than the laughing 'shit.'

Levi's puppiness was good for a few smiles this week. It snowed where my folks live and it was the first time he's seen the white stuff. Snow was on the deck and Levi was so joyful, shouting in his little brain, "Frosty Paws, Frosty Paws!" as he tried to eat it all up. I can't wait to see how he acts when they get five-six inches of snow. Mom will probably have a hard time getting him to come inside.

Guess I'd better get back to my heavenly duties. There's a line of angel-dogs behind me waiting to look down through the magic water to check on their humans. ©

.

Handsome Little Me

While Levi was banned from the computer---which seemed like FOREVER---me graduated from adult obedience school. Me was the smartest dog in the class, but Moomie says not to brag about that because there were only four dogs in the class at the end. Two dogs dropped out along the way. They had whiny pawrents and they didn't do their homework, Moomie said. This photo was taken the last night of class. Doesn't Levi look happy?



Guess what! My friend Ted got to come over for a play date. This is him and me taking a break from playing bitey face. He wasn't too happy that Moomie made us sit to get our pictures taken. Or maybe he's not smiling because he's not cute like me. Well, he WAS cute before his daddy took him to the place that steals hair. Why do humans do that? You'd think they'd learn from their mistakes and stay away from that place.





This picture is Moomie's favorite "big boy" picture of me. It was taken a few days ago after me had to go the hair stealing place like Ted did. Maybe it's a cult, those grooming places. They make humans keep bringing us back with some magic spell, do you think?



Love, Levi

.

First Family's New Puppy

Moomie says the election is over. Me don't know if Moomie's guy won or lost but Levi is glad it's over so she won't be so busy typing, typing, typing on those election debate sites she goes to.

Anyway, Moomie is all happy that some puppy she never met is moving into a big white house far away. We live in a big house so me don't know what the big deal is. Our house is gray and that's almost white, isn't it? It's not like that puppy and me can have play dates together. We won't be able to send pee-mails back and forth. Why is a puppy moving into a white house making Moomie happy? Me asked Moomie that and she gave me homework. Homework! Me has to read these articles before she's going to let me blog again. Darn it! Me wanted to catch up with all my friends here at Dogs With Blogs.


Love Levi


Move Over Barney, a New Dog is Moving in to the White House An article with a brief history of dogs who've lived in the White House


Obama Family Dog First on the List An article about the kind of dog the first family is likely to get. More than 42,000 voters at the American Kennel Club have nominated the poodle over the soft-coated wheaten terrier, miniature schnauzer, bichon frise and Chinese crested since on of the daughters has allergies.


First U.S. Presidential Victory Speech to Mention an Animal? This article includes an amazingly photo of Obama with "Baby," a three-legged dog that lost its fourth limb following years of mistreatment at a California puppy mill.

Presidents and Pets 1953 to 2008. Includes links to photos of all the presidential pets.



.